Rebecca Tulsi, LMFT

 



 

Find The Life You Want

Sometimes life leaves us feeling stuck in a painful place. You don’t need to stay there. I help individuals and teens figure out how to move forward.

When you have a safe and warm relationship with a therapist, you get a chance to explore all the thoughts and beliefs behind your feelings and start to reassemble them in a way that brings you joy. Along the way, you may also learn some new skills. It’s your journey. Are you ready?

 


 

Individual Counseling





Individual Counseling

Something in your life is not where you want it to be. Maybe the problem is external - the loss of a loved one, trouble at work, or too much fighting at home. Or maybe the problem is internal - a sense of loneliness, sadness, fear, apathy, or the lingering effects of not having your needs met in childhood.

Unhappiness is often seen as a problem but I see it as a valuable messenger. It tells us that some aspect of our life needs attention. Sometimes this means we need to look at the decisions we have made and reevaluate them. It can also mean that we need to do some skill-building - learn to stand up for our needs in relationships, learn to manage our emotions, or learn to let go of a belief or fear that no longer serves us.

I believe that every person is capable of healing, change, and contentment. My job is to support you in your journey toward a better life.





Parenting Support

Parenting used to seem a lot simpler. You just did what your parents did and hopefully that worked out well enough. Today’s parenting challenges are a whole new thing. There’s no role model that prepared you to raise a “screenager” in the highly anxious and competitive academic environment of Silicon Valley. There are all kinds of new threats parents have to contend with - easily accessible marijuana, texting, online porn, cyberbullying, and increased rates of self-harm such as cutting, just to name a few. When you also consider that every child is unique and what worked for one child may not work for the next one it’s no wonder that parenting can seem perplexing at the best of times and sometimes overwhelming and scary.

There is good news. Children’s needs have not changed. Children need love, acceptance, and consistent limits. When these essential needs are met most children will no longer feel a need to act out. Early intervention is key. The families I have worked with have all had the best intentions for their children but it is often hard when you’re on the inside to see how one’s family dynamics are reinforcing the problem rather than solving it. I help families recognize the family dynamics that are getting in their way and come up with new ways to interact to de-escalate problems.

We weren’t born knowing how to be amazing parents. The world is a different place than when we grew up. Heck, it’s a different place than it was 10 minutes ago. This new world requires new strategies. For many people parenting is like running in the dark. You read a bit online, you talk to other parents, but mostly you’re making it up as you go along because there is no roadmap for this. Frequently that works well enough at least up until you run into something you never saw coming.

I can help you find a roadmap through whatever parenting challenges you are facing or simply in order to prevent future bumps in the road. I have years of experience supporting families and getting them back to a place of balance and harmony where parenting is fun.





EMDR

I am certified to practice EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) to treat trauma. EMDR is a psychotherapy treatment that is designed to alleviate the distress associated with traumatic memories. EMDR has proven to be incredibly effective in helping clients for whom talk therapy just isn’t working to reduce the distress around events from the past. The types of conditions I have treated with EMDR include memories of losing a loved one, experiencing a natural disaster, childhood abuse, sexual assault, as well as less obviously traumatic memories that nonetheless still feel raw.

EMDR also works well in situations where someone feels like their logical brain knows one thing (like “I’m good enough”) but their gut/emotional brain gets triggered and in those moments they feel completely opposite to what they know to be true. If there is a disconnect between what you know and what you feel and no matter what you do you can’t bring your emotions in line with your thinking, then you may be a candidate for EMDR.

If you’d like more information on EMDR the following sites are a great place to start: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/treatments/22641-emdr-therapy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pkfln-ZtWeY Contact me to explore using EMDR.


 

About Rebecca


How I Work

While I have training in a variety of different treatment modalities I draw the most from Cognitive Behavior Theory (CBT), Internal Family Systems, and Emotionally Focused Therapy. I also use EMDR to treat trauma. During individual therapy I like to balance the more cognitive approaches that provide insight on the thought patterns and core beliefs that cause you pain with more experiential approaches that facilitate the process of change during the session.

What I Believe

Telling your story to a complete stranger is scary for many people, often because it hasn’t worked out so well in the past. Maybe you have faced judgement or there have been people in your life who have not treated you with kindness. Here are some things I believe that will hopefully not only make me less of a stranger but also help you get a sense of whether or not you’d like to work with me:

  • I believe you are always doing the best you can in each individual moment. Why would we choose to do something that we know is bad for us if doing better felt easy? I will never judge you. But if you don’t like what’s going on I will help you figure out how to change.
  • I believe that we feel our best when we are not only kind to others but kind to ourselves as well. I will see what you’re doing right even if all you can see is what you’re doing wrong.
  • I believe you get to decide what your life looks like. There are no “shoulds” in my office. Your path is your own and any way you want to live it is fine by me. You get to set your goals in therapy and I will support you in getting there no matter what that looks like.
  • I believe that the only ingredient we need to improve our mental health and relationships is the ability to face some discomfort. Looking in the mirror and seeing our vulnerabilities and feeling our emotions is uncomfortable. But if you can tolerate that discomfort you will be able to take the necessary steps toward the life you want.
  • I believe that no one is broken. Often what brings us to therapy is our brain functioning exactly the way it was meant to. That doesn’t mean we want to keep doing what we’re doing but we don’t need to beat ourselves up once we understand how the things that are making us unhappy have a purpose. Once we understand we aren’t broken – we’re just solving the wrong problem, we can move forward in a different direction.

    • My Experience

    I have worked with families, individuals, and couples at multiple agencies in the Bay Area including the Community Health Awareness Council, the Salvation Army’s in-patient addiction center, and the YWCA’s Rape Crisis Center. I have also provided mental health counseling in several of the schools in Mountain View and Los Altos such as Springer Elementary School, Huff Elementary School, Egan Junior High, Graham Middle School, and Alta Vista High School. I have been in private practice for over a decade. I have experience working with mood disorders, anxiety, suicidality, parenting challenges, family conflict, eating disorders, sexual assault/molestation, grief, marital problems, addiction, trauma, aging, and transitions.

     


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